Hello Alicia,
Don't know if you remember me, but I met you when I hosted the first So. Cal meeting of Rancho members in my home. I haven't been able to devote much time to my genealogy searches lately but I try to keep up with the group by reading the postings. I found your question a very valid one. I first started by searching my maternal ancestry in 1970. From the time II was very small my maternal grandmother would often speak of her early days in Mexico. As a young adult I would often stop by her house after work and she would tell me stories of days passed. It was then that my interest in my ancestry began. As the years passed and I began asking questions of my aunts I came across some resistance from a few of the elder aunts. I thought this very odd since my grandmother had been very candid with me when she spoke of her life. In fact eight days before her death a video was made of my grandmother as she told her story. At the age of 92 she
was very accurate in her facts and very forthcoming of many details of her life. As years have passed many of my "successes" can be directly attributed to information passed on by her in the video. As I've continued my research I have found that it was quite common for the men in the family to have had more than one family with two or more "wives." Such was the case with my grandparents (both paternal & maternal), and perhaps. There were families left in Mexico, and new families established in the United States. These "skeletons" no doubt were the reason for the reluctance of some family members to share memories of the past. It's too bad because regardless of origin, there is so much richness in our family lines. It wasn't until about 10 years ago that I actively started search my paternal side and, unfortunately, the relatives still living have very sketchy memories of their parents and grandparents. Some, on this side too are
reluctant to share information. But, I keep searching. We never know what will be uncovered. Good luck in your searches to all Rancho members.
Saludos
Olivia Jaurequi-Reyes
Rowland Heights, CA
--- On Sun, 2/22/09, Alicia Carrillo
From: Alicia Carrillo
Subject: [Nuestros Ranchos] Family skeletons
To: general@nuestrosranchos.org
Date: Sunday, February 22, 2009, 9:35 PM
Richard,
I didn't intend to pry in to sensitive material for anyone......just wondered if this was problematic for anyone else. I know in my family there is a lot of lore that has some truth to it and I've been asked by some family relations "why are you doing this"? Some believe that I'm trying to uncover some dirt and that has never been my intention.
As far as I know there are a couple of other distant family members doing Genealogy but I have yet to meet them in person. Most of the family is intrigued by the findings and how it is that we can trace our ancestry. It has been a pleasure to share what I have with different branches of the family. To see the wonderment in their eyes when they see the actual documents that trace back several generations and to hear them say, no wonder my father or mother used to say, "THIS IS YOUR TIO OR TIA or YOUR COUSIN" but I never knew how they were related to me.
I did find one skeleton but rather than flinch, they were intrigued and wanted to know more about my Ggrandfather's out of wedlock child and where might they find this individual and his descendants.
Thanks Ricci,
Saludos,
Alicia, San Jose, Calif
_
Family Skeletons
Hello Luis,
As I previously mentioned I've only researched 2 years 1857/1858 on the Aguas, Aguas. pilot site--entry by entry--and I've come across so many last names I've never heard of before, and my mother is from there. Including an entry 10/22/1858 that reads: "en la Calle de la Carcel: hijo legmo. de D.Amacio Martel y Da. Dolly Levy!" Anyway, don't despair. I've been searching for about two years now with no luck locating/connecting my Onate's, Santelice's, Balderrama's, and Candelas, all from the Zacs, Aguas, and Jalisco areas. All very illustrous names, but no connections. Buena suerte, Alice BB
I'm interested how you found this out because I'm in the same situation with my dead end ancestor, Jorge JAIME (de Xaime) "Espanol, nacido de padres no conocidos." I assume that someone knew who his parents were in El Puesto de San Miguel DE LOS ALBA because he's clearly labeled an "Espanol" and also given a (somewhat rare) surname, which doesn't exist in Ags. in that time period when he was baptized...
thanks,
Luis
Luis Jaime
Family Skeletons
Daniel,
On one of your posts you said
"On there records baptisms ( they have the last name López but "de padre no conocido" y Gorgonia de Mendoza" Everyone knew he was the father except his wife and his other family. THe list goes on of escándolos. Thought I just share this part of Alteño history in my family. -Daniel"
I'm interested how you found this out because I'm in the same situation with my dead end ancestor, Jorge JAIME (de Xaime) "Espanol, nacido de padres no conocidos." I assume that someone knew who his parents were in El Puesto de San Miguel DE LOS ALBA because he's clearly labeled an "Espanol" and also given a (somewhat rare) surname, which doesn't exist in Ags. in that time period when he was baptized...
thanks,
Luis
Luis Jaime
Family Skeletons
Hi Luís, I found out this because she is baptized as de padre no conocido but on her marriage and death certficate she list as hija de Estevan López, natural. Also my grandfather told me. -Daniel
_________________________________________________________________
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Family skeletons
With knowledge comes responsibility. I personally have chosen to be quiet about things learned that would affect family members who are still living. My information is not gathered to cause pain or split families. The things I've learned from the records of the past are another story, those I will report accurately. I have heard more than once that is was not uncommon for the men of Mexico to have more than one family or to have a family plus a "carida". My Father told me on his vist to Jerez in 1936 his elderly uncle took him to meet his "carida" and told Dad as long as she knew her place and it was never put to his wife and he could afford to support both so it was acceptable. His marriage had been arranged as many were in old Mexico. His marriage was more of a partnership so you wonder if this was the way to find love in those days. I don't think it would have been allowed for women but for the men it seemed to happen many times. I did try
to find the children of this relationship but don't know her name and have to assume the children wer of "father unknown. The secrets that would cause pain to those still living will stay secret for my life time but will be in my records for future generations. Rape, incest, murder and intrigue happen in the best of families.Linda in Everett
Family skeletons-positive twist
Erlinda, I think we look at these hidden secrets as a bad thing. In everyone of our families exist things known and unknown. The one thing I value from things I have learned is that
if these unmentionable things did not happen Me and most of my immediate family would not exist. We, and I mean most of us are actually a MIRACLE. I cannot change the past, but Im glad they happened.
----- Original Message -----
From: Erlinda Castanon-Long
To: general@nuestrosranchos.org
Sent: Monday, February 23, 2009 5:34 PM
Subject: Re: [Nuestros Ranchos] Family skeletons
With knowledge comes responsibility. I personally have chosen to be quiet about things learned that would affect family members who are still living. My information is not gathered to cause pain or split families. The things I've learned from the records of the past are another story, those I will report accurately. I have heard more than once that is was not uncommon for the men of Mexico to have more than one family or to have a family plus a "carida". My Father told me on his vist to Jerez in 1936 his elderly uncle took him to meet his "carida" and told Dad as long as she knew her place and it was never put to his wife and he could afford to support both so it was acceptable. His marriage had been arranged as many were in old Mexico. His marriage was more of a partnership so you wonder if this was the way to find love in those days. I don't think it would have been allowed for women but for the men it seemed to happen many times. I did try
to find the children of this relationship but don't know her name and have to assume the children wer of "father unknown. The secrets that would cause pain to those still living will stay secret for my life time but will be in my records for future generations. Rape, incest, murder and intrigue happen in the best of families.Linda in Everett
Family skeletons
Erlinda,
what about writing information about ones dead great grandparents. my parents are still alive so i would be writing of their grandparents. Is that to soon to reveal information? When you say records in the past are fine, well some one had to reveal that information in their present. If they had not done so we would be running into deadends. I am asking these questions because they are ones that I am struggling with. The stories I wrote in the email are ones that can still hurt yet if they are not written down they are lost for the ages.
________________________________
From: general-bounces@lists.nuestrosranchos.org on behalf of Erlinda Castanon-Long
Sent: Mon 2/23/2009 5:34 PM
To: general@nuestrosranchos.org
Subject: Re: [Nuestros Ranchos] Family skeletons
With knowledge comes responsibility. I personally have chosen to be quiet about things learned that would affect family members who are still living. My information is not gathered to cause pain or split families. The things I've learned from the records of the past are another story, those I will report accurately. I have heard more than once that is was not uncommon for the men of Mexico to have more than one family or to have a family plus a "carida". My Father told me on his vist to Jerez in 1936 his elderly uncle took him to meet his "carida" and told Dad as long as she knew her place and it was never put to his wife and he could afford to support both so it was acceptable. His marriage had been arranged as many were in old Mexico. His marriage was more of a partnership so you wonder if this was the way to find love in those days. I don't think it would have been allowed for women but for the men it seemed to happen many times. I did try
to find the children of this relationship but don't know her name and have to assume the children wer of "father unknown. The secrets that would cause pain to those still living will stay secret for my life time but will be in my records for future generations. Rape, incest, murder and intrigue happen in the best of families.Linda in Everett
Family skeletons
In the family that my aunt married into there is an aunt of her husband's who never married, but she had about seven children, even some twins, from as many as four men. My 96 year old aunt knows who the fathers were. The children of these women, cousins to my aunt's husband, are starting to die, and I notice that no father is listed for them in obituaries. I think these children know who their fathers were, but can't list them since these fathers were already married. I have written the names of the fathers in my notes, and I will give that information to one of the descendants in this family that is also doing genealogy, so that someone besides me will have that information. In the trees I have done of this family, I of course do not list the fathers. When I checked the birth records for the children of this woman who bore children from several men, they are listed as "hijo natural".
Emilie
----- Original Message -----
From: Erlinda Castanon-Long
To: general@nuestrosranchos.org
Sent: Monday, February 23, 2009 5:34 PM
Subject: Re: [Nuestros Ranchos] Family skeletons
With knowledge comes responsibility. I personally have chosen to be quiet about things learned that would affect family members who are still living. My information is not gathered to cause pain or split families. The things I've learned from the records of the past are another story, those I will report accurately. I have heard more than once that is was not uncommon for the men of Mexico to have more than one family or to have a family plus a "carida". My Father told me on his vist to Jerez in 1936 his elderly uncle took him to meet his "carida" and told Dad as long as she knew her place and it was never put to his wife and he could afford to support both so it was acceptable. His marriage had been arranged as many were in old Mexico. His marriage was more of a partnership so you wonder if this was the way to find love in those days. I don't think it would have been allowed for women but for the men it seemed to happen many times. I did try
to find the children of this relationship but don't know her name and have to assume the children wer of "father unknown. The secrets that would cause pain to those still living will stay secret for my life time but will be in my records for future generations. Rape, incest, murder and intrigue happen in the best of families.Linda in Everett
Why and Family skeletons
I am fairly new to this group but really appreciate how much I have
learned already. I enjoyed reading people's reasons why they are doing
their family genealogy. I am doing my own because of the skeletons in our
closest and the weird inaccuracies that have formed because of secrets. By
now family members don't know how they are related, where we come from
(other than just Mexico), and why. We have nearly lost the important
stories of our family. This is of particular importance to me as I have
pursued graduate education. My education has been at times uncomfortable
for family members. I have one family member that likes to say "we come
from people with dirt floors" as a reminder that we were not meant for
much. A very sad message to pass on.
In doing genealogy I have in fact learned that I had family members that
were university educated (one was a lawyer) and were able to enjoy
luxuries. None of these families had dirt floors when they were in Mexico.
It was only when they came to the U.S. during the revolution that they had
to start from nothing. Some succeeded. Some did not.
Knowing where I come from and that I am not swimming upstream but rather
carrying forward the pride and integrity of a successful hard working
family has been deeply meaningful for me.
-Esperanza
Family skeletons
I have been working on the jauregui even though I do not descend from them My first cousins mother is a Jauregui and i promised her that i would work on her line. I found a great uncle of hers a few years ago living in utah. he was very old and the person that i actually spoke with on the phone was his wife. from her i was able to gather clues to conmtinue my search. What I found was that (in general)the jauregui men, besides having more than one wife at a time, went through many wives because they kept dying on them. I would find a marriage cert, and it would say widowed for 6 months , and then the next one would say widowed for 2 or 3 years. It was really frustrating at first tring to make heads or tails out of some of the information except that every once in a long while I find some little bit of information on the jauregui and continue on. I have found that the Jauregui's from mexticlan,Nochistlan, zapotlanejo, jalostotiltlan, and tepatitlan,are all related to the Jaure
gui of my aunt who are from el valle de gpe
I also found a branch that came up north earlier and were californios.
Rick
________________________________
From: general-bounces@lists.nuestrosranchos.org on behalf of Olivia Jaurequi-Reyes
Sent: Mon 2/23/2009 12:05 PM
To: general@nuestrosranchos.org
Subject: Re: [Nuestros Ranchos] Family skeletons
Hello Alicia,
Don't know if you remember me, but I met you when I hosted the first So. Cal meeting of Rancho members in my home. I haven't been able to devote much time to my genealogy searches lately but I try to keep up with the group by reading the postings. I found your question a very valid one. I first started by searching my maternal ancestry in 1970. From the time II was very small my maternal grandmother would often speak of her early days in Mexico. As a young adult I would often stop by her house after work and she would tell me stories of days passed. It was then that my interest in my ancestry began. As the years passed and I began asking questions of my aunts I came across some resistance from a few of the elder aunts. I thought this very odd since my grandmother had been very candid with me when she spoke of her life. In fact eight days before her death a video was made of my grandmother as she told her story. At the age of 92 she
was very accurate in her facts and very forthcoming of many details of her life. As years have passed many of my "successes" can be directly attributed to information passed on by her in the video. As I've continued my research I have found that it was quite common for the men in the family to have had more than one family with two or more "wives." Such was the case with my grandparents (both paternal & maternal), and perhaps. There were families left in Mexico, and new families established in the United States. These "skeletons" no doubt were the reason for the reluctance of some family members to share memories of the past. It's too bad because regardless of origin, there is so much richness in our family lines. It wasn't until about 10 years ago that I actively started search my paternal side and, unfortunately, the relatives still living have very sketchy memories of their parents and grandparents. Some, on this side too are
reluctant to share information. But, I keep searching. We never know what will be uncovered. Good luck in your searches to all Rancho members.
Saludos
Olivia Jaurequi-Reyes
Rowland Heights, CA
--- On Sun, 2/22/09, Alicia Carrillo wrote:
From: Alicia Carrillo
Subject: [Nuestros Ranchos] Family skeletons
To: general@nuestrosranchos.org
Date: Sunday, February 22, 2009, 9:35 PM
Richard,
I didn't intend to pry in to sensitive material for anyone......just wondered if this was problematic for anyone else. I know in my family there is a lot of lore that has some truth to it and I've been asked by some family relations "why are you doing this"? Some believe that I'm trying to uncover some dirt and that has never been my intention.
As far as I know there are a couple of other distant family members doing Genealogy but I have yet to meet them in person. Most of the family is intrigued by the findings and how it is that we can trace our ancestry. It has been a pleasure to share what I have with different branches of the family. To see the wonderment in their eyes when they see the actual documents that trace back several generations and to hear them say, no wonder my father or mother used to say, "THIS IS YOUR TIO OR TIA or YOUR COUSIN" but I never knew how they were related to me.
I did find one skeleton but rather than flinch, they were intrigued and wanted to know more about my Ggrandfather's out of wedlock child and where might they find this individual and his descendants.
Thanks Ricci,
Saludos,
Alicia, San Jose, Calif
_
Family skeletons
Hello Alicia,
Don't know if you remember me, but I met you when I hosted the first So. Cal meeting of Rancho members in my home. I haven't been able to devote much time to my genealogy searches lately but I try to keep up with the group by reading the postings. I found your question a very valid one. I first started by searching my maternal ancestry in 1970. From the time II was very small my maternal grandmother would often speak of her early days in Mexico. As a young adult I would often stop by her house after work and she would tell me stories of days passed. It was then that my interest in my ancestry began. As the years passed and I began asking questions of my aunts I came across some resistance from a few of the elder aunts. I thought this very odd since my grandmother had been very candid with me when she spoke of her life. In fact eight days before her death a video was made of my grandmother as she told her story. At the age of 92 she
was very accurate in her facts and very forthcoming of many details of her life. As years have passed many of my "successes" can be directly attributed to information passed on by her in the video. As I've continued my research I have found that it was quite common for the men in the family to have had more than one family with two or more "wives." Such was the case with my grandparents (both paternal & maternal), and perhaps. There were families left in Mexico, and new families established in the United States. These "skeletons" no doubt were the reason for the reluctance of some family members to share memories of the past. It's too bad because regardless of origin, there is so much richness in our family lines. It wasn't until about 10 years ago that I actively started search my paternal side and, unfortunately, the relatives still living have very sketchy memories of their parents and grandparents. Some, on this side too are
reluctant to share information. But, I keep searching. We never know what will be uncovered. Good luck in your searches to all Rancho members.
Saludos
Olivia Jaurequi-Reyes
Rowland Heights, CA
--- On Sun, 2/22/09, Alicia Carrillo wrote:
From: Alicia Carrillo
Subject: [Nuestros Ranchos] Family skeletons
To: general@nuestrosranchos.org
Date: Sunday, February 22, 2009, 9:35 PM
Richard,
I didn't intend to pry in to sensitive material for anyone......just wondered if this was problematic for anyone else. I know in my family there is a lot of lore that has some truth to it and I've been asked by some family relations "why are you doing this"? Some believe that I'm trying to uncover some dirt and that has never been my intention.
As far as I know there are a couple of other distant family members doing Genealogy but I have yet to meet them in person. Most of the family is intrigued by the findings and how it is that we can trace our ancestry. It has been a pleasure to share what I have with different branches of the family. To see the wonderment in their eyes when they see the actual documents that trace back several generations and to hear them say, no wonder my father or mother used to say, "THIS IS YOUR TIO OR TIA or YOUR COUSIN" but I never knew how they were related to me.
I did find one skeleton but rather than flinch, they were intrigued and wanted to know more about my Ggrandfather's out of wedlock child and where might they find this individual and his descendants.
Thanks Ricci,
Saludos,
Alicia, San Jose, Calif
_